A Psychologist Shares How ‘Doorknob Moments’ Can Derail Relationships

Forbes - Feb 11th, 2025
Open on Forbes

The concept of 'doorknob moments' refers to instances where individuals reveal important emotional truths at the very end of a conversation, often as they're about to leave or hang up a call. These moments arise from a combination of fear of conflict, unprocessed emotions, and a need for emotional safety, making it challenging to engage in direct, meaningful discussions. Such disclosures, though they may feel safer, prevent real communication, leaving issues unresolved and potentially damaging relationships over time.

To move past doorknob moments and improve relationship satisfaction, it is crucial to recognize this pattern and adopt more intentional communication strategies. Methods such as pausing before leaving to check in with oneself, proactively scheduling time for honest discussions, addressing concerns directly, and gently redirecting conversations when heavy topics arise can foster deeper emotional trust. By creating a safe space for open dialogue, partners can prevent the buildup of resentment and anxiety, ultimately enhancing the quality of their relationship.

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RATING

6.2
Moderately Fair
Read with skepticism

The article provides a clear and informative exploration of the concept of doorknob moments in relationships, offering insights into the psychological dynamics that lead to these occurrences. Its strengths lie in its clarity and relatability, using real-life examples to engage readers. However, the lack of explicit source citations and detailed methodological explanations limits its accuracy and transparency. While it is unlikely to provoke controversy, it addresses a topic of public interest that can benefit individuals seeking to improve their communication skills. Overall, the article serves as a useful introduction to the topic, though it could be strengthened by incorporating more balanced perspectives and direct references to supporting research.

RATING DETAILS

7
Accuracy

The article provides a generally accurate overview of the concept of 'doorknob moments,' explaining their occurrence in interpersonal relationships and their potential impact. The descriptions of why these moments happen, such as fear of conflict or unprocessed emotions, align with psychological principles and are supported by general research in the field. However, specific claims, such as the impact of last-minute disclosures on communication, would benefit from direct citations of studies to enhance verifiability. The article's mention of research on conversational agency and self-protection in relationships suggests a basis in psychological literature, though it lacks precise references to specific studies or data, which would strengthen its factual foundation.

6
Balance

The article primarily focuses on the negative aspects of doorknob moments, emphasizing their potential to harm relationships by fostering unresolved issues and emotional distance. While it provides a thorough exploration of these drawbacks, it could benefit from a more balanced perspective by including potential benefits or neutral aspects of doorknob moments, such as their role in initiating necessary conversations or revealing underlying issues that might otherwise remain hidden. This singular focus on the negative could suggest a slight bias, as it does not fully explore the complexity of the phenomenon.

8
Clarity

The article is well-structured and clearly written, making complex psychological concepts accessible to a general audience. It effectively uses relatable examples, such as the scenario of a partner expressing dissatisfaction at the end of a conversation, to illustrate the concept of doorknob moments. The logical flow of ideas helps readers understand the reasons behind these moments and their potential impact on relationships. However, some sections could benefit from more explicit transitions between points to improve overall coherence.

5
Source quality

The article does not explicitly cite sources or studies, which limits the assessment of its source quality. While it references research and studies, the lack of direct attribution to specific authors or publications makes it difficult to evaluate the credibility and reliability of the information presented. Including references to authoritative sources or direct quotes from experts in the field would enhance the article's credibility and allow readers to further explore the topic through verified channels.

5
Transparency

The article lacks transparency in terms of citing specific studies or providing detailed explanations of the methodologies behind the claims made. While it discusses general psychological concepts and research findings, it does not clearly disclose the sources or research methods used to support these claims. Greater transparency in terms of source attribution and methodological explanation would enhance the article's credibility and allow readers to assess the validity of the information presented.

Sources

  1. https://www.theraplatform.com/blog/822/doorknob-confession
  2. https://www.blueprint.ai/blog/a-therapists-guide-to-handling-doorknob-confessions
  3. https://clinictracker.com/blog/whats-a-doorknob-confession
  4. https://www.rula.com/blog/doorknob-confessions/
  5. https://www.mentalyc.com/blog/doorknob-confession